There is no words, it’s actually worse nine months on than at time left him. Probably because did not know was getting abused till left him it also was a huge cost to self, confidence, work, finances and emotional along with friendship break downs outwith a Counciller only those that been through same experience know the real trauma.
Something that is still there I only was in relationship a year and stayed nine months with him it went from bliss to could not swallow properly, could not go to yoga, swimming or anything as it cost to much and right at end to what wore – I also had become his emotional outage and yes I knew he had a not good childhood something I learned from elsewhere but there was never any excuse for using someone you are in a relationship with.
To take it out on there was no middle ground, if I did not agree to his way he ran out on me or lost his temper at me for speaking up – in end I was frightened to talk be seen in public felt needed his permission for everything and he then turned around and said I not making your decisions or controlling you – nine months on yes my whole life was being dictated and controlled for nothing more than money. Plus genuine fear could see it was getting closer and closer to violence and the rage more often I was continually walking on egg shells and all said or done was wrong!!! Even speaking to friends on messenger was grassing him up even though I was just talking to them as friends.
Plus was his slave which ended up not being a joke as I was and called thick 40 to 50 times a day at end
Many suffer at these people hands yet the authorities, police still are only now beginning to act I also want to phone people who would be able to tell me what to do. As realise I should have reported him to police and still can yet I know need to move on stop letting outside forces those that still believe him get on with it!!! They are putting themselves at risk and I can do nothing I was only person to see his behaviour behind closed doors and it was very different from the person he made himself out to be in public.
The horror, trauma, how low he would sink to get money ie marry then dump me after getting a house along with fact he not work yet all my wage went for things for him if wanted to buy for self again told could not afford it
Anyone else experienced this???? Sort of behaviour from someone who meant to love you and more must be done to help people go through something that is like living with the devil himself!!! And that can’t trust anyone afterwards that it still remains in the background though less with each passing day.